my food intake

I have a Hiatal Hernia. I've had it for about 4 years now (off topic - but I've owned my truck for 5 years as of Sunday. 123,000 miles later it's still doing good). It has been a long process getting used to changing my diet. I am often asked what exactly I can and cannot have. I recently found this list on a GERD website. Let's start here:

citrus fruits
chocolate
drinks with caffeine
fatty and fried foods
garlic and onions
mint flavorings
spicy foods
tomato-based foods, like spaghetti sauce, chili, and pizza

Additionally I have found that I can't have spicy food, a lot of Chinese food, or carbonation beverages. Occasionally you will see me eating chocolate or drinking Cherry Coke. I have learned how to tolerate these and how to get my body to accept them (early in the day and in small portions).

There are three other foods that I consider to be of the Devil:
raisins
pickles
raw bananas (I'll eat dried bananas just fine without throwing up, and banana bread is my third favorite type of bread.)

With these food challenges, I have two other challenges - to eat better and to exercise more. To eat better I turn here.

So there you have it. If you are ever hosting me or trying to feed me - there is my guideline.

28

I turned 28 a few hours ago. Surely you must have heard the fanfare. No? Really? Weird.

I'd like to think I'm not only older but I'm wiser, but I'm not sure about that. I learned a long time ago not to date 18 year-olds yet I did it twice this year with the same results. My life experiences out weigh their life experiences and they get scared.

I only had a few different majors this year and they were more thought out before I changed them...but I still had about 4 different majors. I'm now a University Studies major with a really high possibility of graduating April 6-7th.

Up to about 2 days ago I thought I was moving to CO or UT, but being home does something for you. Being in Cali with lots of jobs and high pay and a dream of a better life...makes those mountains, trees and rivers less important. We'll see where I stand in 14 weeks.

I was going to spend my time here in CA catching up on my writing, reading some books, visiting some historic sites...but I'm just being lazy and sleeping all day. I go out at night and sleep all day. I really would like to be doing more with my life but after last semester's trauma, and all of the drama from 2006 - I'm pretty happy just sleeping and watching House and The Office on the internet.

Merry Christmas to all! Happy New year!

Love, Sean

Official Grades

Hi Everyone. It has been forever since I posted. But that is with good reason.

My grades became vitally important to me this semester. My grades at mid term weren't anything to brag about so I made an effort to change that:

Adaptive PE - A
Soc 112 - B
PR - B- (it was a F at midterms)
Soc 111 - C (it was a a D at midterms)
Book Of Mormon - C (it was a B at midterms. I sacrificed this class in able to bring up the two others.)

The other reasons I haven't had time to post in the past two weeks are that I had a funeral to go to which put me 4 days behind schedule and I've been dating SZ for about 2 1/2 weeks. Between her schedule and mine, I was spending every available minute with her. She and I will be separated for 2 1/2 weeks starting tomorrow, so our time is precious.

I went to a jazz thingy tonight

I have started seeing this girl, SZ, from Rockland, Il recently. We met in the Galley (I know - how romantic!) and I really enjoy her companionship. Tonight she had a great idea that at first scared me.

A hangout place recently opened up in Rexburg called Heart Mind and Soul (They took my "hot chocolate" idea and expanded it greatly.) Every night they have some form of live music. This evening was no different. Tonight they had a jazz band playing jazz music, and SZ suggested we go.

It was amazing.

I'm not a big jazz fan, but they had a guy playing there tonight named Brent Jensen. He played the alto Sax and he mezmorized me. SZ is very attractive and very comfortable, but every now and then I was just transfixed. There was a guy who was playing and instrument that looked like a trumpet but wasn't a trumpet and he did great as well. There were a magnsifgant drummer and up right bass players as well.

It was just a great evening. I'm considering converting over to being a bit more of a Jazz fan.
I can still hear the sax in my head (along with the Pussycat Dolls singing "Buttons".)

A first time for everything

Getting the mail today was like a Bi-polar experience. On the one hand I got my first Christmas card of the season from Dun & Gu.

On the other hand, I got a letter from USU's admission department. I got accepted to Humboldt State, Sacramento State, and Cal State East Bay with no problems. I even got accepted, and eventually went to, BYU-Idaho. I was accepted to Ohlone, my Junior college, as well with no hassle.

So today was a new experience. I have a 2.743 GPA. USU denied my application because it wasn't a 2.75.

So I now go with plan B. I'll graduate from BYU-I in July with a BS in University Studies with an Emphasis in Sociology, Literature, and Public Relations.

However - the denial process hasn't ended - I'm still considering Grad School, many of which only require a 2.5 to get in.

A job well done

I go to BYU-Idaho, a frankly better school that our sister school down south. However, our school is lacking a major college tradition. We don't have a football team. In fact we don't have any sports that involve other schools. When we have football on the weekend, BYU-I wins 3 games and loses 3 games when only 3 games are played. Yee Haw - Go BYU-I!

Our sister school down south - BYU-Provo - did a miraculous thing this weekend. After 4 straight years of losing to the University of Utah, BYU beat UofU. In fact, they beat them in Salt Lake in the last three seconds of the game. For a clip, go here.

Way to go BYU!

It's been a while

It’s been a while since I posted last. I’m working on a 5-person group project right now and only 1 ½ of the people are working. Those 1 ½ people have to pick up the work for those that aren’t. It’s frustrating. In addition to this, I’ve been doing a lot of reflecting.

It’s been a while since I’ve lived in CA. I’ve lived in Rexburg for the last 20 months. Prior to that I lived in Oregon for nearly 6 months. Prior to that I lived in Rexburg for 6 months. That’s nearly 3 years. Yet I will soon leave Rexburg for CA. I’m going to live in CA for about 3 ½ months before returning to Rexburg to graduate in July. (Assuming a lot of things like that I pass Com 235, that I then pass Com 335, Assuming that I don’t get accepted to USU and then have to decide what to do with my life after that – go to USU or Stay at BYU-I, assuming I don’t freak out in CA and join a cult of anti college freaks.)

I have a hard time remembering what it feels like to live in CA. I have been in small towns and farming communities for 2 ½ years. Slow moving, relaxing days floating down the river or sledding down the hillsides; “normal” people who show up to job interviews in slacks or at least their best overalls; “normal” people who aren’t pierced and tattooed to the extreme; Idaho politics that involves water rights and elk hunting. I’m leaving this to go “home” to CA to a different life.

It’s been a while since I was home for a major holiday. I haven’t spent a November thanksgiving with a family member since 2003, which was at KNJ’s place and my father and John came. I haven’t spent a Christmas or birthday in CA since 2004 (last year I spent it with Steve). Lastly, I haven’t worked in a theatre in over 2 years. In other words, everything I used to really enjoy has changed. It’s been a while since I was CA Sean.

It’s been a while since I was on my mission, but I still remember it. My mission was from Sept 22 1999 to Jan 12 2000. I served for an additional 3 months (Apr 9) on my couch before receiving an official release from the church. But it is now, back in 99, which I was in Tucson. During the summer I met a girl over myspace who lived in Tucson. She lives just outside my old area boundaries. While discussing with her where she lived, we used Google Maps. I found my old area and saw an aerial view of my old area (it seemed bigger when I was on a bike.) That brought back a lot of good memories. Now days I support the mission effort by writing to 8 missionaries serving through out the US (MN, NM, CA, OH & Chicago, IL) and the world (Brazil, Taiwan & Portugal). As I write to them and occasionally hear back from them, I think back to that time in my life 7 years ago. I look at the Sean that existed back in 1999. The summer Brother and Sister were married in, the mission call, and then leaving. In 2000 I met John. I met KNJ in 2002. My mother died in 2003. I left for ID in April 2004. KJN and I said our final good byes in November 2004. And then now. I look at the person I was in 1999 and who I am now. In some areas I’m a better person. In other’s, I’m worse. Nothing stayed the same, not even my hair.

Like I said, I’ve been in a reflective mood lately. Sorry

I had almost forget

...what it was like to throw up.

I have a hiated hernia on the back of my esophagus. It was discovered about 3 years ago (during an emergency apendicitus operation). I made cetain changes in my diet and I started having success in eating solid food starting in June 2006 (yes - it took that long to give up soda, chocolate, and a few other comfort foods.)

I haven't thrown up in 5 1/2 months, nor have I felt nauseas in as much time. This is way different from the 2+ years prior to that where I threw-up at least once a month and sometimes once a week.

So in that almost 6 months I had totally forgotten what it felt like to have a day like today. I woke up this morning, got ready for my day in the library (The end of the semester is coming - so are a million projects). I was just about ready to go to class when my stomach errupted. I spent the rest of the day feeling sick to my stomach.

Oooh how I have forgitten these days. Oooh how I don't miss them.

***
On a side note - KNJ enter the MTC on Wednesday. (For that metter - so did my cousin)

I got me some pumkin pie!

Money is a weird concept in my life. For example, I have a beer can coin jar that I'm using to save my pennies for the BYU-Idaho Legacy Fund.

But I don't splurge all that much with money. I kind of splurge on chocolate from time to time. But I got a really cool gift in the mail today. ~Gu~ sent me pie money. It's no secret that I'm not a fan of cake so imagine my joy when I got pie money. I went out right away and bought a Pumkin Pie with whip cream. It will be gone by Sunday and, no, I'm not sharing.

Thanks Gu!

My back packing trip

To further my adventure process, I went on a back packing trip in the middle of October. Instead of telling you about it, I'm just going to copy and paste parts of a letter I wrote to my Grandma.
There are a few pics on my Photo blog
Enjoy.
--------------

Hi. How are you? No really, how are you? I’m doing okay. Today I’m coming to terms with how much I enjoy modern technology. On Thursday, for a class I was in in the summer, I got to go backpacking. This was my first time in a tent in over 9 years. Every summer, when we’re driving to [Brother's] place, my dad requires me to bring the tent “in case we need it.” We never use it (because let’s be honest – could you see my dad camping anywhere?), but he makes me use it every year. My last several girlfriends have been anti-camping as well.

So Thursday, at 8am, I loaded a bus and headed off to Bear Creek in Southern Idaho. I was a little apprehension to go on this activity. My wrist got taken out of the cast only a week before, but it is still in a splint and continues to heal as I go to physical therapy twice a week. (I cry at every one as they push my wrist in ways it doesn’t currently want to go.) I knew the trails would be muddy and there would be several slick river crossings, but I had to go in able to fulfill my requirements for the class.

After about a 90-minute drive, we arrived at what would be my home for the next three days and two nights. We unloaded our trailer and put on our packs and moved out from there. We had hiked for about a mile when our professor gave us two options. We could go another 3 miles and camp or go another ½ mile and camp. I was with the group that voted to go on, but we were 4 lonely voices among the other 8 people chose to camp there. So we crossed a river and found ourselves in a nice little clearing with ridges on both sides and a stream to our northern side. From it we could look out to see another ridge and the river. It was really pretty. The ridges kept us sheltered from the wind, but also the sun. This was particularly important on the first night. Because the sun spends less time in the clearing, it got cold faster and deeper than if we had camped 3 miles to the west. The temperature at 2 am was 20 degrees. I didn’t really know how to camp in that weather, so I was freezing the whole night.

On Friday we went on a 2-4 mile hike. The group split up after 2 miles because a girl was having serious health problems. She had left her high blood pressure medication in town and was now on a trail that went straight up. Even the people that are physically fit were having problems. I stayed with her, and half of the rest of the group, and rested.
The rest of the group traveled another 60 minutes up the hill. After 90 minutes from their original departure, we rejoined them to walk down the hill. They went about 5 miles while the rest of us went almost 4 miles. Thankfully we were not in full backpack gear, or I’d still be on the trail. On Friday night I slept better and on Saturday we hiked out.

There were three significant things that happened on this trip. The first started on the first day. We were sitting around the campfire when two horsemen rode up into our campsite. They asked us if we had seen 2 white horses. Two of this guys horses had wondered off in the middle of the night. On Friday, the guy had 4 separate search groups out looking for these horses. He had guys on foot; horse; motorcycles; and he even had a plane searching overhead. The group that traveled the extra hour up the hill saw the horses on a ridge 3 ridges over. We were able to call on our cell phones the guy who lost his horses and helped in the rescue of these horses. And we were but humble backpackers. It felt kind of cool to be able to help in that. It was really nice to have our cell phones working in the middle of nowhere.

The second thing that happened that felt kind of nice was when we were hiking out. There were 12 in our group plus a TA and a professor. At least 4 of us had solid medical training. All 14 of us had up-to-date first aid kits. This came in very handy when we came across a hunter. He was driving in supplies for Elk season (which opened on Sunday) on a two-wheel dirt motorcycle. He rolled his cycle a couple of times down a hill. He wasn’t wearing a helmet and was about a mile into the trail when he rolled. I got to be a medical assistant to my teacher and the Teacher’s Tutor. We helped the kid walk out and get to his vehicle. The really significant thing was he was passed up by 4 other hunting parties. We were able to help him because killing an Elk wasn’t our top priority. Even his own father left him behind. It felt good to help out.

The last significant thing was I figured out how much I love modern science. Growing up, we camped as good people camp – we drove our stuff in, set up a tent, had a fire dinner (usually a “hobo” tin foil dinner of hamburger, potatoes and carrots that our moms had packed for us). This whole hiking in, using stoves to cook and having to hang a bear bag for every meal we do…Ugg! In addition, I really like sleeping on solid ground. We ended up camping in an area that was bumpy. I either had a rock in, a mound of dirt, or my tent mate’s knee in my back both nights. I really enjoyed coming home to a comfy bed that didn’t have rocks, knees or bumps in it. A warm apartment with good stoves and a dishwasher and a furnace is really a great blessing from God. I appreciate it a lot more now.

On a lighter note

My cousin in serving his mission in Africa sent this to his family and they passed it onto me:

Two men are drinking at a bar. One of the men tries to get up from the bar and falls down. He gets up again and falls again. He does this several times. The second man watches this for a few minutes before he goes over to the first man and says "I think you're too drunk. Let me drive you home."

When they get home the drunk man's wife comes out and thanks the second man for driving her husband home. Then she gets a frantic look on her face and asks the second man, "Where is my husband's wheelchair?"

It is time for a change

This has been brewing for a while. Recently DB suggested that I need to look at my belief system and see if I need changes.

In 2003 my mother died. In a quick move, I went to BYU-Idaho. I was an Elementary Education major. After 2 months of school, I dropped out of that major, as I was not handling the idea of Special education while dealing with the death of my mother. In Fall 2004, I dropped out of school and took a 6-month vacation from school (and life). The diagnosis of three counselors was “delayed grieving.” The only reason I went back to school was because BYU-Idaho said I wasn’t going to be allowed back in if I didn’t come back in summer of 2005.

Since July 2004, I’ve had 7 official majors with a total of 14 majors (I got to the point that I didn’t ask, I’d just change majors). I was never happy in a major. I found several majors I wasn’t happy with…and I found myself constantly leaning back to one aspect of my life. There was always one topic that kept my interest. There is one topic that I have always scored well in.

California, Utah and a few other major states have created Autistic Only schools. I was happiest in my life when I was teaching. I have continued to work with people with disabilities and I have found a great joy in that type of lifestyle.

This desire to teach has led me on a quest. BYU-I has a K-3 special ed program that is pretty exclusive to Idaho. So I looked elsewhere. University of Idaho in Moscow has a K-12 program. Utah State University also has a K-12 program. Cal State Hayward (I mean East Bay) does as well. All of those K-12 programs are universal, meaning I could teach anywhere in the continental United States. There is a special education Teacher shortage through out the US, as well. And this is something I’m good at. There is a saying "Autism has its own language." I have learned I speak Autism. I additionally work well with people that are mentally and physically disabled.

In my research I have found a few qualifiers. Most Special Ed programs are 60 credit degrees (some are 48). Pell Grants and Stafford Loans run out at 180 credits. I will have in December 119 credits (Total from Ohlone College, LMC, DVC, and BYUI).

Additionally I have found out that Stafford and Pell Grants are only for your first Bachelors. According to the Financial Aid people, there is a possibility of a 12-month loan after petition and a good GPA (which I don’t have) for a second bachelor, but they are not as likely.

I found out that there are loan forgiveness programs available to those that become Special Education Teachers. Up to $17,000. It won’t cover it all, but it will cover some.

I think that I’ve done my homework effectively and done enough. Now comes the big decision. Should I change course? Should I leave BYU-I? Should I do it without a degree (My options at this point are a degree in University Studies which is practically worthless, though not entirely)? Should I stay? Are there things I haven’t considered? Is my father going to kill me if I do this?

It's officially Winter

Winter has finally come to Rexburg. It started snowing this morning at about 7:30 and it has been snowing ever since. The teacher closed the blinds in class today because so many of us were distracted watching the now fall. It's peaceful, beautiful and tranquil. It, of course, sucks to drive in, walk in, and sleep in, but it is so nice to play in and watch. (I'm trying to go figure out how to go sledding with a healing wrist.)

And for those of you that know about my feelings toward October - My October ended this morning at 7:30.

Career and Internship Fair

Thursday was kind of a depressing day. It was the career and Internship fair at BYU-Idaho. The first two things that were depressing:

1.Connect PR wasn't there. I blame BYU-Idaho for this.

2. There wasn't one single school district represented. The US is facing a huge teacher shortage. Contary to one readers comments, we can't all home school our kids. We need qualified teachers - yet there wasn't a single school district there begging for teachers. I blame BYU-Idaho for this one too.

Lastly, it was depressing for me. There were between 50 and 60 companies and none of them interested me. None of them were places that were innovating wheelchairs; or advocating for people with disabilities; or having ways to create simpler situations for people with disabilities. We've got a Baby Bommer Generation that is in the process of graduating. As this generation of a million children grows old - their bodies will deter and need better inovations to deal with those disabilties. Additionally, thanks to this man, we are creating a generation of younger disabled people as they come home from a civil war. There were a lot of businesses and paper pushing jobs. There were a few nursing and border patrol jobs. There were even the normal guys. But there was nothing I wanted to do.

This is a family trait I guess. My father hasn't worked in 4 1/2 years because he can't find a job that suits him. Brother has three degrees (2 BA's and 1 Juris Doctorate) and isn't happy with his occupation.
No wonder I am not trapped in by those normal jobs...

Happy Birthday Dad

60 Years ago today in Chicago, Illinois My Daddy was born. Also this year we see that brother is half as old as Daddy. I remember when I was 25 and H was 50. I had so much fun that year.

Happy Birthday Dad!

Why not...If Katie can do this - so can I

A - Available: Yes, because making out with LC lacked substances and got boring.
A - Age: 27
A - Annoyance: right now - my cold; in general - people who walk on the grass & don't cross streets and railroads at designated crossings; Ooh and North Korea.

B - Best Feature: ummmm...according to others it's my eyes, but I think it's my passions
B - Beer: Budweiser - I don't drink it, but I must admit they have a better plant tour than Miller
B - Birthday: Dec 27

C - Crush: nyquil
C - Car: Cars are for family people - I drive a truck
C - Candy: Though I'm not supposed to have them - Reeses Peanut Butter Cups

D - Day or night: night
D - Dream Car: Toyota Tundra
D - Dogs or Cats: Dogs & cats are evil little things - give me some rats and I'm happy.

E - Egg nog: You know I hate throwing up - why even ask.

F - Favorite color(s): black or blue
F - Favorite Band: Queen, Yo yo Ma, Hilary Hahn, the Garden State Soundtrack, Israel "IZ" Kamakawiwo'ole - Oh, you wanted only one

G-Gummy Bears or Worms: No body likes me, everyone hates me, I guess I'll go eat...
G - Giver or taker: I'm more of a giver.

H - Hair Color: Dark brown
H - Height: 6'00"
H - Happy: I'm better now than I was 2 years ago but I'm still growing - trying to find out who sean is.

I - Ice Cream: Cookie Dough, though I recently had Ben & Jerry's Strawberry Cheese Cake and that was good
I - Instrument:The Kazoo, though i want to learn Banjo & Cello
I - Idols: Prophets

J - Jewelry: I wear my medica chains and the CTR ring my mom gave me
J - Job: Student, friend, Adaptive Services
J - Jail: Never been, though I have been to prison several times.

K - Kids: None that I know of, but I've dated women with kids a few times and so I could have kids and just not know it yet.
K - Kindergarten teacher: Oh crap! I don't know. Who ever wasn't KT's kindergarten teacher.

L - Longest Car Ride: There's a tie: Rexburg, ID to Oakland, CA & Miles City, MT to Madison WI- Both were 16 hours.
L - Lamest Inside Joke: All my inside jokes are way cool!

M - Meat: Dead cow or Dead chicken. I'm not a big fish fan though I will eat if it is made for me and is Salmon. I eat turkey twice a year.
M - Most missed person: my mom, though KNJ is a very close second
M - Movie Last Watched: Batman Begins (On a date last night)

N - Number of Siblings: 1
N - Number of Tattoos: 0...so far
N - Name: Sean

O - One wish: To be in love and to know where I'm going with life

P - Perfectionist?: at times

Q - Quick or Slow?: depends on what you're talking about
Q - Quiet?: When I'm around people I don't know very well, I'm very quiet. If we're good friends, I'm extremely loud and quite obnoxious at times.

R - Reason to smile: Dad, Brother, Sister and O
R - Reality TV Show: World Series of Poker, beyond that...I don't really watch reality TV.

S - Song Last Heard: "Somewhere Over the Rainbow" by Iz
S - Season: Summer
S - Shoes you're wearing: none. I'm trying to convince my self to go to bed

T - Time you woke up: The first time? I've been sick since about 10pm last night and coughed through the night.
T - Time you went to bed: 1AM
T - Time Now: 11:47 PM

U - Unpredictable: sometimes
U - Underwear: Yup

V - Vegetable you hate: asparagus
V - Vegetable you love: broccoli, corn; are 'shrooms a vegatable
V - Vacation spot: I haven't been to Disneyland in 9 years, but I still prefer CA, AZ, or WI any day.

W - Worst habit: changing majors
W - Where are you going to travel next: I'm not sure, Maybe Provo, maybe somewhere from the blog listed below.
W - Weather: We're expecting Snow this week...and I'm going camping in it. Grr.

X - X-tra special someone: John, my dad, my family in WI, Grandma, Papabear/Wawa...
X - X-rays: All over. I'd say well over 30. I'm surprised I don't glow in the dark.

Y - Year it is now: 2006
Y - Yellow: Not a great color
Z - Zoo Animal: Hippos, elephants, and polar bears (because all other bears are evil.)
Z - Zodiac Sign: I thought the Zodiac was a killer. He had signs too?

Thank's KT

What do we do with Sean?

The school over accepted 1200 students. Additionally, my GPA is sitting at 2.709. To get on Fast Grad I would need to be at 2.8 and not be competing with 1200 extra students. Therefore I have nothing to do from December 20, 2006 to April 16, 2007. I'm trying to figure out what to do with myself. I have lived continuously in Rexburg for 18 months (It will be 20 by December). I no longer can be labled a gypsy (Thanks Sis). My advisor and I both think it would do me some good to get out of Rexburg, but I'm struck with: Where should I go? My advisor suggested Reno, AZ (return to the area of my mission), Texas and North Carolina. I'm pretty opento those, as long as I can find work and a place to stay.

I open this up to the rest of you, though. I do have qualifiers:

No Oregon
No South Carolina
Nothing north of Chicago and still in Illinois (Imagine a square box with Chicago on the east, Beloit, WI on the north/top end of the box, LaMoille, IL on the south/bottom end of the box and Clinton, IA on the west side of the box - nothing in the box until July 2008)

The last qualifier is I don't want to be a burden on my father and John. (I grow best when I don't live with my father. I could live 10 minutes away, just not with him. John has no way of housing his truck and mine.)

Can any one think of anywhere I could go to get life experiences, get out of mormonville, and find housing and a job?

Depressed Deer

After alerting America to the great threat that consumes our country with Jack Rabbit Terrorists, I feel it's important to mention that the various deer that scatter our nation's country side are not terrorists. Instead, they are depressed suicidal deer bent on ending their existence of constantly being compared to Bambi.

It's a hard life for a deer since the corruption of the Disney Empire and their sadistic cartoonist have produced that magical movie. Did the cartoonist really have to make Bambi so cute? No, but they did just to screw with every normal deer nation wide.

Do you realize how old it gets hearing yourself constantly compared to a fictional character? For the same reason most women oppose porn, deer oppose Bambi and his perfectness. Bambi is not real yet people are constantly looking at deer and saying "Aww! Isn't he cute? He looks just like Bambi." or worse "Aww! Isn't he cute. He's almost as cute as Bambi." No one can be as perfect as an unrealistic creature. It's just impossible.

But the true depression comes during hunting season. when shouts of acclamations chorus through the forest "Yup, I shot him right between the eyes. I shot Bambi's daddy." Ted the deer and Steve the deer are screaming at the top of their lungs, "That's not Bambi's dad. He was my father." Not even in the murdering and slaughtering of their own parents can they find ownership. Their own fathers are seen as "Bambi Dads." Not even in death can they escape Bambi.

It is these reasons that lead deer to commit suicide daily. Living in a world where Bambi has been is just too much for these dear poor deer to handle and they just get to a breaking point that a moving automobile is a better outlet than a llife being compared to Bambi.

Depressed Dear

After alerting America to the great threat that consumes our country with Jack Rabbit Terrorists, I feel it's important to mention that the various deer that scatter our nation's country side are not terrorists. Instead, they are depressed suicidal deer bent on ending their existence of constantly being compared to Bambi.

It's a hard life for a deer since the corruption of the Disney Empire and their sadistic cartoonist have produced that magical movie. Did the cartoonist really have to make Bambi so cute? No, but they did just to screw with every normal deer nation wide.

Do you realize how old it gets hearing yourself constantly compared to a fictional character? For the same reason most women oppose porn, deer oppose Bambi and his perfectness. Bambi is not real yet people are constantly looking at deer and saying "Aww! Isn't he cute? He looks just like Bambi." or worse "Aww! Isn't he cute. He's almost as cute as Bambi." No one can be as perfect as an unrealistic creature. It's just impossible.

But the true depression comes during hunting season. when shouts of acclamations chorus through the forest "Yup, I shot him right between the eyes. I shot Bambi's daddy." Ted the deer and Steve the deer are screaming at the top of their lungs, "That's not Bambi's dad. He was my father." Not even in the murdering and slaughtering of their own parents can they find ownership. Their own fathers are seen as "Bambi Dads." Not even in death can they escape Bambi.

It is these reasons that lead deer to commit suicide daily. Living in a world where Bambi has been is just too much for these dear poor deer to handle and they just get to a breaking point that a moving automobile is a better outlet than a life being compared to Bambi.

so what do you do now?

My cast came off on Wednesday. What would a responsible person do? He would probably not go country and swing dancing, but when have I ever been responsible?

As a promise to BSR & AM (why are there so many AM's in my life?), if the cast came off, I'd go dancing. Little did I know that even when you're "healed" you still need time to rebuild strength. I'm in a splint now. I can remove the splint to shower and excercise my wrist.

But I went anyway. There is an interesting problem at the country and swing dances. Swing has 1.5 girls for every guy. Country has 3 girls for every guy! Girls there are so happy to dance they will even take on a gimp with no dancing skills (I used to dance before I met KNJ, but she hated going to dances - so we never went. I no longer have those "skills," though I still have numchuck skills.).

I really thought once I got the cast off, my milking days were over, but atlas no! With the splint, and trying my best to look pathetic, I can still milk these girls for a little more time in their arms. God Bless America and modern science. (In the old days they would have just shot me like they shoot lame horses. They shoot horses don't they?)

Some thoughts on Homeschooling

I know some people are going to be upset about this, but I will try to be fair.

I have recently met several people who have claimed that homeschooling is best for a child. They claim that public education is failing their children. Some thoughts:

Of course public school is failing our children:

• Society doesn't pay its teachers enough, so you have really stressed teachers trying to figure out how to pay a morgage when they should be focussed on teaching children.
• You throw 20 to 30 kids in to a cramped classroom. Imagine the US army using 1 soldier to fight 20 or 30 soldiers. Do you think that the US soldier could get to each of those other soldiers. Even if s/he was a really good soldier, s/he isn't going to be able to take out all of the enemy. Some are going to get away or fall through the cracks. The same goes for teaching. The teacher has to try his or her darndest to teach all of the kids, but some are going to fall through the cracks.
• No Child Left Behind has encouraged more and more teachers to leave the business or retire earlier than they had planned on. So instead of older teachers mentoring younger teachers, you have fresh out of college teachers who don't know everything.
• Teachers (in Eled) see the student for 6 hours a day. Teachers of High school see that student for less than 6 hours a WEEK.
  

After seeing all of these negatives, dumb parents pull their kids out to home school them. Why is this a dumb idea?

• Professional teachers go to school for 4-6 years to become teachers. There they are trained to be the best America has to offer to our students. Most parents don't have an education degree. (In fact a lot of mommies don't have anything beyond a degree in general studies.)
• Whether you want your child to learn about America Idol at a young age or not, it is important for your child to be social. Unless that student plans on living in a vacuum for the rest of his life, he is going to need to know a little bit about pop culture. "The Water Cooler" effect is an important part of the industrial and business world. Students need to learn to socialize about non-work related items. Students being home schooled don't get propper socialization and are not trained up on how to deal effectively with others in a social setting.
• It spoils your child. Children that are home schooled get used to one on one attention. The real world does not provide one on one attention. Students that are home schooled do not learn that in order to succeed they need to pick up things the first time because the professor is not going to repeat it. Bosses get annoyed by an employee coming to them all the time asking for stuff.
  
• It creates an enviroment where student don't learn to work in groups. Business today is all about working in groups. Homeschooled children do not typically have group assignments. Therefore, they don't learn how to effectively work in a group to solve problems or complete tasks for a company.
• Sex ed should not be taught with your sister in the room.

My father strongly likes the idea of school vouchers. My sister really likes the idea of private schools. I am more in agreement with them than I am with parents that choose to homeschool their children. While homeschooling has some benefits, I'm not sure it should be supported.

A football, A Brick Oven, A Peak and how I got back on for a ride

Life has been busy complicated lately. I'm kind of seeing a girl right now. Nothing official - just a lot of making out and talking. She's more like LK than KNj so I'm trying to figure out if I'm going to keep her around. She actually has lower standards than me...if you can imagine that.

School has been busy as well. I added two classes pretty late into the semester and am playing catch up in those two classes and trying to stay up in all my other classes, and leave my apartment and the Library every now and then.

My cast comes off on Wednesday and I'm praying I'm all better. I'm tired of being in a cast and going to class.

But even with the cast...I've been having adventures.

The weekend of September 22 I had three adventures. I don't know if DUN & ~Gu~ think consiously of ways to bring adventures into my life or are they just naturally cool and thus adventures spring from them. But I was in Provo this weekend to see a play (which sucked) on the Friday night. On Saturday, Dun took me to see BYU play USU in football. This was my second college football game. Brother took me to a bowl game back in the 199o's. The Mizzou tigers were playing in a bowl game for the first time since the civil war. The game with my brother was nice, but it involved drunken fans and seats where I couldn't see a lot of the game. DUN bought tickets that were high up in the bleachers on the west side of the stadium (right above the BYU marching band - that weren't half bad as long as they were sitting. The formation of the Tuba players on the field needs some work though). I was able to see the whole game from our spot. And for once I got to feel school spirit. By going to a school without a football team I don't feel any unity with my classmates. We don't have a common foe. I talk to J.Splatt (page 2 of link) recently and we were talking about BYU-I football. On Thursday night there were three games. BYU-I won and lost all three games. How annoying! I really loved being at BYU Provo's game. This was truly a great adventure DUN.

On Saturday night, Gu insisted we go to this resteraunt called "The Brick Oven." Words cannot describe how fat I would be if I lived in Provo. The resteraunt was superb. They had really really good (low carbonated) rootbear and the best pasta I had had in a long time. It was heaven. Gu always cooks these magnisifant means when I'm in Provo, that the Brick Oven can't compare, but oh was it sooo good.

On Saturday night I had my third Provo adventure. DUN recently discovered this little exit off the road about a mile into Provo Canyon. If you take it you go up this windy road filled with fall colored trees. It was pictuestque (I can hardly wait until I have money to buy an SLR camera, I dished out almost $400 this past Friday for truck repairs, and I'm not done yet, so the camera will have to wait). At the end of this road is a place called Squaw Peak. It is so beautiful up there. You can see all the way to the Nevada border. It was just awesome.

My last adventure was on Friday. I'm in the process of gathering information for a paved path cycling blog I'm working on. So on Friday, BSR and I went on a bike ride to Rigby lake. It is a mile long trail that circles the lake. I took out the Scarab initially. I took two laps on that before trading bikes with BSR. Then I took out the Freedom Ryder. I managed to not flip it and I didn't break my other wrist. Instead, I got a sense of recovery. I felt empowered to be back on the bike again after 5 weeks off of it. I wouldn't say I was scared of riding again, but I was aprehensious (spellin?). It felt so good to be back onthe bike. I think I'm going on another ride this coming Friday in Blackfoot. I'm excited again.

***
In Unrelated news - KNJ got her mission call, as did my cousin EJC. Both enter the MTC on the same day in November. Weird.

in my Mission!

This is an article in a newspaper in Arizona. It describe a dual amputee missionary serving the in the Arizona Tucson Mission (My mission). Make sure you check out the slide show. It's got some awesome pics including a hand-crank cycle.

Terorist Jack Rabbits

In a recent trip across Wyoming, I came upon a region infested with terrorist Jackrabbits. Jackrabbits, as you may know, are furry little creatures with big ears and really big back legs. Unlike their relatives, these are not cute bunnies. These are terrorist Jackrabbits bent on the destruction of America, even if is one car accident at a time.

The Terrorist JackRabbits (or TJRs) were not born terrorists. And might I add, not all jackrabbits are terrorists. In the course of their lives, though, some jackrabbits just go astray. No one is quite sure when it starts, but everyone is clear on the results. TJRs are a force to be reckoned with.

Some of you readers might be questioning at this point, “What is the mission of a TJR?” It’s a simple one: Disrupt American Travel! How are they going about this mission? By repeatedly attempting suicide missions.

In the course of just four miles of road, I counted over 50 dead successful TJRs. These initial slaughters seem to be trial runs. These are the TJRs that were chosen to be part of the first wave or the “experimental group.” Their mission was to see what times of the day work best to attack. Additionally, they were assigned to figure out if they should go it alone or in pacts when attacking. Lastly they were assigned the importance of figuring out what vehicles would give them the greatest reward.

Daylight showed the worst results. People in family vehicles often swerved or broke or even stopped. The worse were the families that not only didn’t hit the TJR, but instead got out of their Dodge Caravans to take pictures. Nothing gets a TJR teased more than being photographed while trying to express terror and destruction.

Another result was that big vehicles, or “tractor-trailers”, or “Semi’s” seemed to be the worse vehicles to attempt to destroy. They rarely slowed down and never was damaged caused. The TJR’s suicide was in vain.

Through this “experimental group” the TJRs came to the conclusion that nighttime attacks worked the best, especially if the intended target was a family size vehicle, preferably a small car with very little clearance in the undercarriage. This brought the TJR’s to the second phase or the “practice group.”

It’s not easy jumping in front of a moving car at the right time to cause sufficient damage. Three main TJRs are required. The first is the lookout. He is stationed ¾ of a miles up the road. His job is to look for potential victims to attack. When he sees a small car with a sleepy driver or a family full of young children that adore jackrabbits, the lookout stomps his foot three times on the ground signaling the second vital TJR to get ready. The second TJR is known as “The Sacrifice.” His family will be honored greatly by his willingness to die for this cause. They will be rewarded handsomely if “The Sacrifice” does an incredible amount of damage to the passenger car. The Sacrifice is by far, the most important TJR in these attacks.

The last TJR is the analysis rabbit. His job is to survey the results: see how many people died, see what damage was done to the car, see how far The Sacrifice had to jump to do the best amount of damage. This information is critical to the last phase of the mission.

The third, and final, phase is known as the “All ahead full group” This phase is coming soon. Soon the people of America will know what is like to have their travel plans altered. Soon America will know what the phrase “Road Closures” really means. Soon, very soon, the TJRs will know the taste of victory and asphalt better than they’ve ever known it before.

If it weren’t for the TJRs, we, as a people, would be left to think that those 50 carcasses on the roads of Wyoming were just really dumb animals that can’t navigate a simple two-lane road with out getting hit. And we all hope their not that dumb of creature. I mean jeez, some people hunt jackrabbits. I’d hate to thing the dumb hunters wasted all that time and ammunition for something I could do in a Honda Civic in Wyoming.

The Jackrabbits are terrorists

In a recent trip across Wyoming, I came upon a region infested with terrorist Jackrabbits. Jackrabbits, as you may know, are furry little creatures with big ears and really big back legs. Unlike their relatives, these are not cute bunnies. These are terrorist Jackrabbits bent on the destruction of America, even if is one car accident at a time.

The Terrorist JackRabbits (or TJRs) were not born terrorists. And might I add, not all jackrabbits are terrorists. In the course of their lives, though, some jackrabbits just go astray. No one is quite sure when it starts, but everyone is clear on the results. TJRs are a force to be reckoned with.

Some of you readers might be questioning at this point, “What is the mission of a TJR?” It’s a simple one: Disrupt American Travel! How are they going about this mission? By repeatedly attempting suicide missions.

In the course of just four miles of road, I counted over 50 dead successful TJRs. These initial slaughters seem to be trial runs. These are the TJRs that were chosen to be part of the first wave or the “experimental group.” Their mission was to see what times of the day work best to attack. Additionally, they were assigned to figure out if they should go it alone or in pacts when attacking. Lastly they were assigned the importance of figuring out what vehicles would give them the greatest reward.

Daylight showed the worst results. People in family vehicles often swerved or broke or even stopped. The worse were the families that not only didn’t hit the TJR, but instead got out of their Dodge Caravans to take pictures. Nothing gets a TJR teased more than being photographed while trying to express terror and destruction.

Another result was that big vehicles, or “tractor-trailers”, or “Semi’s” seemed to be the worse vehicles to attempt to destroy. They rarely slowed down and never was damaged caused. The TJR’s suicide was in vain.

Through this “experimental group” the TJRs came to the conclusion that nighttime attacks worked the best, especially if the intended target was a family size vehicle, preferably a small car with very little clearance in the undercarriage. This brought the TJR’s to the second phase or the “practice group.”

It’s not easy jumping in front of a moving car at the right time to cause sufficient damage. Three main TJRs are required. The first is the lookout. He is stationed ¾ of a miles up the road. His job is to look for potential victims to attack. When he sees a small car with a sleepy driver or a family full of young children that adore jackrabbits, the lookout stomps his foot three times on the ground signaling the second vital TJR to get ready. The second TJR is known as “The Sacrifice.” His family will be honored greatly by his willingness to die for this cause. They will be rewarded handsomely if “The Sacrifice” does an incredible amount of damage to the passenger car. The Sacrifice is by far, the most important TJR in these attacks.

The last TJR is the analyses rabbit. His job is to survey the results: see how many people died, see what damage was done to the car, see how far The Sacrifice had to jump to do the best amount of damage. This information is critical to the last phase of the mission.

The third, and final, phase is known as the “All ahead full group” This phase is coming soon. Soon the people of America will know what is like to have their travel plans altered. Soon America will know what the phrase “Road Closures” really means. Soon, very soon, the TJRs will know the taste of victory and asphalt better than they’ve ever known it before.

If it weren’t for the TJRs, we, as a people, would be left to think that those 50 carcasses on the roads of Wyoming were just really dumb animals that can’t navigate a simple two-lane road with out getting hit. And we all hope their not that dumb of creature. I mean jeez, some people hunt jackrabbits. I’d hate to thing the dumb hunters wasted all that time and ammunition for something I could do in a Honda Civic in Wyoming.

No, those jackrabbits aren’t dumb. They are Terrorist Jackrabbits.

Wish List

Occasionally people want to do something nice for me. If you ever have that happen in your life but you don't know what to do, here are some suggestions:

Charities
Cancer Society
Boy Scouts of America
LDS Church Missionary fund
BORP
Perpetual Education Fund
Any Soldier

Pipe Dreams
Wife
iTouch

Cameras
video camera


Gift Cards
iTunes/iPod
Target
Wal-Mart

Art
Fans Shed Light on the Game

Tools
Sawsall

Clothing
BYUI Sweatshirt
BYUI Jacket

Money
I would love a government bailout for my credit card or student loans.

Added 2009
A cowboy hat like my father's
Digital SLR
New Car stereo for the truck (so pretty much a gift card to Best Buy)

The United Fraternities and Soroieties of the Cast

Membership is simple: Break a castable bone.This of course leaves out toes, ears, and most face bones. Anything else is fair game. As long as the bone is fractured or broken and there is a predominate cast on it, you can join one of these Greek societies.

This Fraternity/Soroity comes with the same membership like applications that other Greek organizations come with. First is the initial application. This can be done in several ways as long as the end result is a broken bone with a cast on it. Some are victims, I mean applicants, of circumstance: They break their bones in car accidents. Some are heroic applicants: They break an arm by allowing the beam of a building to fall on them instead of the innocent child or puppy that the beam could have fallen on. There are double heroic points if the potential disaster involved both children and puppies. Others won't take much thought to their application process. In fact, not much thought is involved at all: These are the dare devils; the stunt doers; the adrenaline seekers. These are the people cwhose parents looked at them at birth and knew instantly the little cute child in their arms would, at some later date, mount some angry bull, fly through the air and land on a completed application to join the fraternity or soroiety of the Cast.

Folowing the application comes hell week. Real men and women take on hell week in the summer. Weak applicants do it in the spring. Hell week consists of having x-rays where the x-ray tech has you place your broken bone into positions that would have hurt, even if your bone wasn't broken, all in the name of getting the best shot. This is followed by a doc, usually of the Emergency Room variety, constantly pushing on your hurt area to confirm that it actually does hurt, before puting the cast on.

After this exchange, Hel week is ready to move into the second phase. If a leg is broken, you get to learn how to put only 15 pounds on that bone when in actuality you weigh 145 pounds. If it is a broken arm or WRIST or hand, you get to learn how to do the most mundane things, like tying your shoes or washing your hair, withonly one hand. These activities are further complicated by the increased energy required for these tasks thus making you sweat and making the skin under your cast itch.

As Hell week wraps up, the final test of Hell week is a patience test. Unless you're still in junior high school, most of your days aren't spent with people randomly coming up to you with a permanet marker in hand asking to write on your arm. However, as your last test of hell week, this is exactly what will happen. Like a collection of random tattoos by non-artistic people, your cast will soon be a mosiac of your patience.The patience test comes frrom people writing slowly, misspelling words and by them twisting your cast in ways not even the x-ray tech dared twist you. You must wait for these sadistic people to stop. After this, your Hell week is over.


Mebership does come with priveledges. For example, you are different than those who have never broken a bone before. You have that experience over them. Additionally, you have the right to seek out other people with casts and tell them embellished, exaserated stories of how you got your broken bone, what 8 million things went wrong while you had it on (including losing your job, losing your signifgant other, or you being convicted of a crime and being sent to prison because everyone assumed you were the one armed-man), and then finally being able to relate how long you were actually in the cast and then adding 2 months (or 2 years depending on how guilble your pledge is).

The best privledge is: Once a member, always a member. From now until the day you die you can look new Pledges in the eye, glance at their cast and proclaim "Oh that's nothing. I rescued 1,000 people from a burning building before the structure fell apart on mer, breaking my arm in 102 different places. I happened to live on the equator at the time and spent my summer down their recuperating. I'm a better person for it. You go that riding a handcrank cycle? That's nothing!"

Irony, $$, stats, and English

I was dipping around on myspace today. (Yes I know - I have a 15 page essay I need to proofread and I have a ton of Stats work to to, but I needed a mental break)

While I was there I ran across a group called Pageant 2006. I joined up of course. While I was there, I ran across a picture of this guy. He's a year older than me. My ex-girlfriend KNJ was really weirded out by this guy. Really weirded out. Like she wouldn't stay in the same room with him, unless I was there.

Anyway, I found out he was married. Guess who he married. KNJ's 20 year old cousin. There is actually a pic on her myspace website of KNJ being a bridesmaid for Erin. That's what I call irony.


On a different note, I'm saddended to report that I'm poor again. I got a scholarship this semester. I still took out my normal amounts in student loans though, hoping to have a bunch of money at the end of the semester to do stuff with (Like go to Cali for a 3rd time this year. Or to go see Grandma, or to buy a car [shh...don't tell dad about that one...]).

So I was saddened to see that I'm still poor in this, the last few days of the semester. So I checked out my bank statements and was reminded of why I'm poor again:

$381 for my new Dell computer after my old computer up and died on me.
$90 for two new Epinepherine shots
$80 for Drugs
$78 Madison Memorial
$~50 Madison Memorial
$23 Madison's Doctor Service
$~80 Mountain Valley Imaging
$348 Madison Memorial
(the last 5 are from my ER trip.)

In Total: ~$1100

This is in addition to two items I purchased that I thought I had budgeted for (I didn't realize my ER trip was going to cost me so much):

Ipod Nano - $150
Rowing Machine - $130

Gee - no wonder I'm poor.


Oh well. At least I have my Stats book and essay to keep me happy.

Amish

Every now and then I consider becoming Amish. Mainly this thought comes to me when I think of getting dressed in the morning or when I'm considering asking a girl on a date.

As my sister will attest - I'm not the best well dressed boy. I have a tendency to wear what ever is next in the closet. My outfit doesn't nessesarily have to match or even be close to complimentary. I just wear what's next. The Amish lifestyle begs me to join it's ranks on clothe selection alone. Black pants, solid colored shirts, black hats and suspendors. what could be more simple than that. In fact, the women have it even better. I'm not known to date women that wear make-up. I hate make-up. I like my women "plain" or "natural." Whose more natural that an Amish girl? Solid colored dresses, no make-up, not a lot of jewlery. This in combination with bunned hair. How cute!

Dating would be another reason why I would enjoy being Amish. It's pretty simple. You marry whose in your village when they reach the age of 18 or 19 and the guy is in his early 20's. There isn't a lot of dating. Guys ask a girl and she says yes or no and then they get married in late October. Simple - and definately not expensive. None of this having to court her with flowers and candies and expensive rings. Just simple down home eenie meenie minie moe.

My last reason for being Amish would be because of the chosen career path. For a guy who has changed his major about 13 times in 2 years, having your occupation preassigned is a pretty cool idea. I'm going to grow hay, raise cattle and have a good old fashion barn raising every now and then. A little hard work and a little sweat, but in the end...no 13 majors to choose from.

However, as I looked over an Amish website yesterday, I was reminded of why I'm not Amish. Two major reasons occured. 1. I am scared of horses. 2. They have internet access on the farms which means no blogging. And what would life be like with out blogging?? It would be primative.
I'm glad I'm not Amish.

Forbidden Fruit

Yesterday I spent my afternoon with an amazing girl. I've known her since she was 3. I used to be her brother's best friend, but at about 17 that started to fade away and I really began to notice JM. We tried the dating thing 10 years ago, but we were in way different spots back that. Last night, after a trip to Mesa Falls and the Teton Dam (Pictures and a blog to follow), we came back to my place and watched a movie while I massaged her shoulders. I loved the softness of her skin. I just love being around her. But she doesn't see me as a potential. She's not going toward me.

In the activities office there is a girl who works for "Talent - Exploration." She is beautiful. She has a great personality. I just love talking with her and hearing her thoughts. She's mature yet can still have fun. She loves life and is living it. But I doubt she has even ever thought of me in any other terms but as the guy in the activities office.

Why is it that we often fall for the people that are just outside our reach? I'm not who I was last year. I know who I am and where I'm going with life. Yet still I can't snag that girl that makes my life. I must like forbidden fruit.

The Boot

I got my license on August 8^th 1995. In total I have been driving for 12 years. In those 12 years I’ve been pulled over twice. One of those times I was extremely lucky to have some one else travel by me going much faster so that just as the officer got off his motorcycle, he got right back on, pulled up along side of me (To tell me to slow down), and drove off after the other guy.

The other time I got pulled over I was a noise violation. My exhaust manifold was disconnected from my exhaust tail pipe. My truck would set off car alarms in parking lots simple by turning my truck on. The officer was nice enough to write me out a ticket and put my father’s name on it because my father was the sole proprietor of the truck (this would be my old truck…not my red one.)

In addition to NEVER getting a ticket, I have never been in a car accident that was my fault. I’m been rear-ended, side swiped, tapped, had a rock (about the size of my fist) hit my windshield, had a tire dent the side of my truck, and lastly fish-tailed my truck into one of those center divides that are on major freeways (by the way, those of you that question the BIG dent in the side of my truck – my dad did that by jack-knifing a u-haul trailer into the side of it). I have never even hit an animal or a jaywalker (though that is not to say I haven’t tried.). And lastly, unlike my brother, I have never purposely caused a stampede or scared livestock.

I am a good driver.

So imagine my surprise tonight. I took a friend of mine out for ice cream. After Ice cream was over (Which cost me a grand total of $1,67) I took her back to her apartment where we sat and talked for a while. We decided to go for a walk and we went out to my truck to get my sweatshirt. She lives at an apartment complex called Royal Crest. I would later find out that Royal Crest has a bad reputation for it’s parking administration. Sadly, I found out the hard way.

Attached to the front tire of my truck was a “boot.” For those of you that don’t know what a “boot” is, it is a C-clamp that clamps onto your front tire and can be locked. The clamp prevents you from driving any where (supposedly it tears of your tires, your rims, and your undercarriage.) – not that you would want to drive any where because if you do, there is a $500 fine for taking off with some security company’s security equipment.

How much do you think it would cost to get this taken off? Would you imagine $40? Yeah – neither would I. $40 for 30 minutes worth of parking. Not even San Francisco meter machines are that bad. But that is exactly what I got to pay tonight to have the boot taken off of my truck. Rachel has agreed to pay for our next Date and she promises it will be worth more than $40. She was very apologetic. I told her not to worry about it, but that to promise me to not let me park there ever again.

But for an Idaho adventure, this was definitely a first. I’ve never been booted. Not in Idaho or anywhere else for that matter.

The tearful Jelwry

I am not a fan of jelwery. (Before I get too far into this blog - I just want to remind you I can't spell. So I will probably spell that word ten different ways.)

I like rings, to a certain extent. Beyond that, I'm not a fan of jelwery, or for that matter any thing that really detracts from being with the girl. I hatet makeup because I like natural beauty. I hate bobbie pins and berrets because if you want to play with a girls hair you have to take them out of her hair first and often times they get caught on her hair and it ruins the moment of playing with her hair (especially if you were making out at the time). In fact I hate that particular item so much that when I moved Joh out of the apartment I used to share with him while I was dating KNJ, we found like 20 bobbie pins strewn across the apartment from when I would want to play with KNJ's hair. I realize there are times when a girls hair requires bobbie pins, but as soon as that time is over, away they go.

But I digress. I hate jewlry. I'm not sure where this hatred comes from except from the days when I used to be a lip whore and make out with a ton of girls (which I haven't really done in about 18 months) When you're making out with a girl and you kiss her ears, if she's wearing studded earings, it can poke your tounge. That hurts. If she's wearing a necklace and you are massageing her neck, you can get your hand tied up in her necklace and choke her. When you're holding hands and you have rings one and you want to give her an affectionate hand hold squeeze, you can hurt her fingers or yours. (I always have on this one ring my mom gave me. When KNJ & I held hands, it was always in the set of hands that niether of us had rings on.)

That said I had two occasions with jewlry today that that affected me. Siting in front of me today at tchurch was a girl with pearl earings and a pearl necklace. It made her look stunning (don't ask me why, but the dress she was wearing made me think she would look good pregnant, but that's atleast three years off for her). For me all her necklace did was bring back memories.

KNJ didn't want a wedding ring. She works with electricity and on ladders and with electrical equipment that could snag her ring and peal the skin off her finger. So for our weddingI was saving up to buy her a beautiful Pearl Necklace. This got me thinking about KNJ for the first time in about two months.

The second event of my bad jelwry day was when my friend "Mooch" (Her knick name for herself) was sitting next to me in church today. On her writst was a braclet of butterflies. My mother loved butterflies. She had butterfly earings, butterfly rings, butterfly necklaces and butterfly braclets. When ever I would ask my mom advice about what to buy a girl for Christmas or birthday the response was either butterflies or dolphins. Mooch saw me admiring her braclet and handed it to me. It only took a few seconds of holding it and watching the polished sea stones reflect in the light before I was crying. Such a simple piece of jelwry and I start crying. I hate crying in public. KNJ was the only person I ever really let watch me cry. But today, for a brief moment, tears streamed down my cheeck for the beautiful butterflies of days gone by.

On Sunday July 30th will be my mother's three year death date. I'm sure there are more crying fits on their way. If a simple hated piece of jewlry can do it...More of it is bound to come up.

Another biking trip

On Friday I picked up 3 of the adaptive bikes, MN and headed out to Steve's place for destination's unknown. I'm still on the hunt for good places to go riding on a bike. We originally went to Harriman State Park because Steve swore it had paved paths. I figured he was the local expert. He was wrong and there were no paved paths.

Next we headed up to Island Park. We found a bike path just north of the road for the Island Park Resevoir. We parked the truck and unloaded the bikes. I was on one of the Freedom Ryder hand cranks. MN was on the other. Steve took the Scraab (like this bike). This was MN's first time on an adaptive cycle, but being bored she decided to come along. It took her a little while to get into it, but eventually she was lapping me.

The bike path ran for about a mile before hooking up with the road leading to the resevoir. Actually, that was the road that led to the road that went to the Resevoir. We went for about a mile and a half on that road before taking a sharp left onto the road that led to the resevoir. Around us for that 1.5 miles was tall pine trees and crows. I saw a couple of smaller birds that were yellow in complection, but, unlike Josh, I have no earthly idea what they were. There were a lot of horse flies and other insects as well.

Once we took that sharp left on to the other road, we continued to have pine trees on our left, but on our right was a marsh. Cattails swayed in the slight breeze next to us. I kept seeing blackbirds with redheads, and it was a bright red: Red lipstick from a pretty girl, not dull red like ketchup. After about half a mile, the marsh opened up to the lake. The water looked sooo blue, I had almost forgot what that looked like. It looked like cool water as well. This road eventually put us right ontop of the Island Park Dam (note the pic in the right corner of the link). Just below the dam is a hydro-electric plant. I rested there for a little while watching the hydro dam work. Well - that and to let MN and Steve catch up. There is a spot to turn around just beyond the dam and we turned back then. All in all it was an 8 mile trip.

Next we loaded up the bikes and traveled out to "Mack's Inn" and Big Springs. Big Springs is the starting point of the Henry's Fork River. If you leave your truck at an LDS church in Mack's Inn (That's the actual name of the town), you can bike in 6 miles to this picnic/historical cabin spot. There is a bridge at the end of the 6 miles where you can watch the water begin to flow down to the Henry's Fork river and then eventually down to the Snake River. Standing on this bridge looking into the water was just freaking awesome. I saw 2-3 foot trout swimming just shy of being under the bridge. And the water was sooo clear, like clearer than any water I had ever seen. It was beautiful. I wish I had a camera to show you how clear the water was.

Additionally to the trout there was a moment for me to prove my City Kid awareness. MN is training to become a Park Ranger and Steve was born and raised here. So when we saw a creature swimming in the water they both laughed at me. At first I identified it as a beaver. Then as an otter. Steve and MN both agreed that it was something called a muskrat.

Anyway, the reason for the bridge and the trout and the picnic area (oh, and the very annoying rivergulls) was that fact that a German imigrant named John Sack used to live there. In the 1930's he hand built the cabin and built an aquaduct system that used the water coming from the spring to operate a water wheel that produced enough electricity to light his cabin. It is pretty awesome to see what he did. I think I'll go there again.

All in all it was a pretty good day. I look forward to biking there again (now if only I owned my own Freedom Ryder or had the tools to build one for myself - then I'd go on these adventures more often.).

Softball - Tournamet Style

For a Softball report we turn to Bob and Fred

Fred - First off, we'd like to appologize for this delayed report. During the summer BYU-Idaho runs on a quarter system (instead of the semester system run during Fall and Winter). Sean's computer has been busy with him writing final essays. We couldn't get in to write this.

Bob - Not that there is much to write.

Fred - Yes. Please Bob - continue.

Bob - In Tournament style if a team is ahead by 10 points by the third inning, the umps can (and will) call the game. After 3 innings, the Big D's were losing 12 to 2. This of course was because the Big D's let 9 runs in in the first inning.

Fred - How did Sean do?

Bob - Sean got up once and got out running to 1st base (he grounded to the second base man). Sean's fielding wasn't much better. He dropped the ball about three times. The big problem occured in the first inning when Sean went to slid to get to a ball. The sliding re-opened his left knee. He bled through his pants and down his leg. It freaked out the other team as well as his own. Sean is now limping again and it hurts more this time around the first time he injured it on Tuesday.

Fred - It's a good thing second quarter softball doesn't begin for three weeks. Time to heal.

Bob - Yes except WCB starts on the 8th.

Fred - Are we bringing the play by play on those as well?

Bob - You better believe it.

Fred - Well, until then, this has been a sucky softball report.

Another Softball Report

And for this weeks softball report we again turn to Bob and Fred.

Fred - Welcome to tournament season. This week begins tournament season for softball for BYU-Idaho. Sean is playing for The Big D's. (no - he didn't come up with the name). How did Sean do today?

Bob - Sean batted 6th tonight, 1 up from his usual 7th position in the batting order. During his first at bat, on the third pitch Sean hit a outfield ground ball to get on base. He ----

Fred - Wait! Sean actually got on base???

Bob - Yup. He was as surprised as you are and was actualy dancing on the first base and, in a little girls voice, chirping "I got on base. I got on base."

Fred - Wow, that's amazing. Did he stay there?

Bob - On the next hit on the next batter, the base coach told Sean to take third. The ball was there before Sean was. Sean slid anyway, tore his pants, and wounded his left knee. He was out.

Fred - It's important right now to mention to both Sister and Father that these were work jeans - not the ones either of them had purchased in the last year. How was Sean's knee?

Bob - It bled. But sean didn't care; he got on base. For his next at bat, Sean did an in field ground ball but was able to move his chubby butt up to first base before the ball and got on base. The next batter drove Sean to second. The next batter after that was the third out. Sean Never made it past second. For his third and final at bat, the bases were loaded with 1 out. Sean hit the ball pretty close to second base. The guy running from first to second got out, but San batted in a run. That's right Fred - Sean actually got an RBI!!

Fred - It sounds like Sean had his best day yet at the plate. How was his fielding?

Bob - Sean didn't have any pop-ups into right field, but he did stay in front of the ball all three times it came near him. He ran well and helped keep people on there bases. He did not get anyone out, though.

Fred - Did any one score off of him?

Bob - No. They just got to base before he got to the ball.

Fred - And the team - how did they do?

Bob - Well, after losing three times in the three games played in the regular season, the Big D's pulled out this time and won 11 to 7. On a bit of a ironic note, this was the same team they played last week and lost 25 to 10 to.

Fred - What now?

Bob - The Big D's advance to tomorrow. Sean has to make the descion to go to 12-step (which he hasn't been to in two weeks) or to go to the game where he will actually be needed. But the Big D's do move on.

Fred - What about Sean's knee and pants?

Bob - Sean's knee has been washed and cleaned and is now drying out. His pants are soaked with blood and he's not allowed to play in torn jeans. So those jeans will soon become shorts and he will take his last pair of work jeans with him tomorrow, if he goes.

Fred - How does Sean feel?

Bob - Today was a crappy day with ADG breaking up with him. As ~Gu~ put it "Sean, you just can't catch a break." But ending the day with an RBI and only 1 out on his scorecard. Sean's pretty stoked.

Fred - Well until tomorrow (probably), I'm Fred and he's Bob and this has been a softball report.

A softball report

For todays softball report we turn to Bob & Fred;

Fred - So Sean had another game last night. How did it go?

Bob - Sean got hurt during the warm ups.

Fred - It wasn't even during the game?

Bob - Nope. Sean was warming up playing catch when he missed catching the ball and got beamed in the left shoulder. However, instead of stopping and going home, he stayed to play.

Fred - How was Sean in right field this week?

Bob - Sean caught 2 pop-ups to get to people out. Additionally, Sean made a sliding stop to get in front of a ball and throw a person out at third.

Fred - It's a good thing Sean doesn't have a wife to complain about the grass stain from that sliding stop.

Bob - It's okay - he was in one of those pair of jeans that are work jeans.

Fred - How was his batting?

Bob - Sean hit all three times he was up. He never made it to base and was the last out of the game with three people on, but at least he hit every time. In fact on his last hit he almost hit the pitcher as well. Line drived it right at the pitchers chest.

Fred - How did the rest of the team do?

Bob - Instead of losing 32 to 2 like they did last week, they loss 25 to 10 this week. But they still suck. Their cheerleaders could probably play better.

Fred - How's Sean's pain level?

Bob - He hurts but not as much as last week. Maybe being active is really heping him out.

Fred - Well, until next time, This is Bob & Fred with the Softball report.

The music truck

Some of you, my wonderful readers, grew up in the sticks. Some grew up in the Suburbs. And an even smaller number of you grew up in the city. For people from the sticks, I'm not sure you had a music truck. I think the Schwan guy was the closes you got. For those of you who grew up in the city, it probably wasn't a truck but a guy with a little cart walking the streets and ringing a bell. But for those of us familiar with suburbia - there was the music truck. If you're unfamiliar with the music truck, it was a guy in an old mail truck that drove up and down the streets playing annoying music. He usually would wait outside elementary schools at the end of a school day to play music for the kids as they came out. Some kids would rush to his van and give him money. Mother said this was because thry liked his music, but that she didn't so we wouldn't give him money.

I don't remember at what age I found out that the music truck (with the music man) was not a music truck as my mother had told brother and I. It turns out that the guy in that truck sells ice cream. OOOhhh my mother - what a tricky woman. It was really an Ice Cream truck all those years. I could have been eating bubble gum ice cream or funnels or ice cream sandwichs or rockpops in my childhood instead of apples, if only I had known it wasn't a Music truck.

It is now summer here in Rexburg. Rexburg doesn't even have the Schwan guy. And definately no music trucks. I miss California.

Active

At the end of May, I could feel myself dipping into a depression. My therapist and I talked and he suggested that the reason why is I needed to be more active. I had just spent the past 4 months being very active at work (throwing beef). My body had grown used to it. I spent 2 weeks in Cali being semi active. Only to come back to school and becoming a paper weight. So my therapist suggested I run (yuck!!!!), ride a bike, or anything...just something. He actually suggested I sweat if at all possible. And he suggested I do this every day.

Then, ever so quickly, I got active. I'm now considered an active person - a chubby active person, but still an active person.

For example: On saturday I biked 8 miles on a handcrank cycle. Tuesday I played softball with my ward (congregasion)'s softball team (I had two ups, hit the ball twice, got out before reaching base each time.). On Wednesday I bowled. Today I went on a date with this really cute girl from Pittburg, Ca and we went with the school canoeing for and hour and a half. Saturday I'm going for a bike ride again. Next week will have the same sort of repeat performance.

This of course is all in addition to the rower I bought. I have a rowing machine in my room that I row with for 15 minutes each night. Suddenly I'm Active. Active I tell you.

An Idaho Adventure

This morning I picked up Steve with the intent of discovering some nice paved paths for cycles. Steve was riding the Scraab (looks like this) and I was on the Freedom Rider. For some reason, I really like riding the Freedom Rider. I think it goes back to the fact that I'm not a big fan of excerising my legs. That and living in Cali whose govonor is costantly quoted as saying "I'm going to pump you up."

Anyway, the first place we went to was the Idaho Falls Beltway. It's a bike/jogging route that runs along side the Snake River in Idaho Falls. It crosses the river twice, thus the name "beltway." And it's about 4.5 miles long. It went okay, but it was crowded. It was a beautiful ride, though. I've never been that close to the falls. They were truly beautiful. I wish I had my camera for it, but it is still in Target waiting to be purchased. The water rushing and the crystal clear water was just an awe to watch.

Next we went out to Shelley. This, as well, was a path that traveled along the Snake River. (Southern Idaho is the truest form of A River Runs Through It. The Snake River or some aspect of it runs all through the state.) We parked the truck at Steve's sister's house. After a breakfast of 2 oatmeal rasin cookies and a glass of water, we were off. This trail was 1.5 miles long and it was straight. (As in a very distict begining at the end of an elementary school playground and it ended into a park.) I think this was the trail that burned me. I was wearing shorts and for the first part of the day, NASA was probably having satelite problems, as my legs reflected the sun back up to the rotating satelites in space. I hope I didn't start any wars with spy satelites getting mixed signals off my legs. I'm sorry if I did.

I entered the trail at about 1/2 mile in. I rode/hand cranked down to the park. Right behind the park was an air strip for remote control planes. In the air above the strip were 5 gas powered airplanes having a "dog fight." 4 of the planes had ribbon or stream on the back of their tail wings. This really helped in seeing how close the planes were getting to each other. Every now and then the ribbons would smack each other and make a cool noise. Really Really close dog fighting in wooden planes. It was freaking awesome. Toward the end, one of the planes stalled out and crashed in a farmers field. I watched it crash. I actually watched it stall and knew exactly what it was doing, so I felt pretty smart.

Ever since Dun wrote his blog on his fasination with planes, I've been watching the skies and seeing the planes fly around. With it being summer, the Rexburg Airport (I use that last statement very loosely) has had a pilot flying a P51 Mustang over Rexburg and other areas. (the "other areas" because Rexburg is so small that just to get up to a cruising altitude, this guy has left city limits). I am in the process of building a plane and I think to myself how nice it is to have planes.


Anyway, I continued on the path after watching the other planes land. I did about 8 miles hand cranking today. Then I came home, rearranged my room, and did some more work on the wheelchair I'm building (WCB is only 1 month away. I've got to get my chair built and start practicing in it soon). All in all - it was a great experience. I might repeat it next week with a bike trip up to Island Park, or even Yellowstone.

***As a side note, I ate the raisin cookies without complaining. The food adventures are paying off. If I could just get over my fears of pickles and bananas I'd be doing great.

****As a different side note - I'm currently listening to James Blunt "Beautiful." (-:

What can I use my OCD for now?

When I was in Cali I found closure. It was one of the weirdest feelings that I think I've ever had. I was able to see closure on the house in Central Fremont and all of the horrible things that happened there. I was able to have partial closure on Pageant. I was able to have feel the closeness of family and "real" friends. I was able to just move on past everything.

On the second to last day, I ran into KNJ at church. We had a 10-15 minute discussion. I was able to get closure even with her. Though she didn't say it...I know her well enough to know she forgives me. I finally was able to admit to my self that I forgave her. It was one of the weirdest feelings to be forgiven and to forgive.

I was able to have closure on the Sean I was when I left Cali 2 years ago and the Sean I am now. I'm way different. Not just in my mind, but in the mind of other friends and family and even my father (who is the hardest person to admit I've changed). I'm not sure in which specific ways, but I'm not that guy, I'm not the Sean from 2004. I don't know if I'm better, but different.

The sweetest reward was seeing I was happy again. Much of 2005 was spent in misery as I struggled with my demons and worked through finding out who I was. Prior to 2004, I was building my life around my mother and KNJ. In 2005 I had niether, and I had to decide...who am I? Who is Sean?

I'm not sure it's a consise answer. I still see the influences of mother and KNJ, but additionally, I see the influence of other wise people in my life. My focuss isn't just on those two. It's on taking insights from everyone, whether that's DUN & ~Gu~ or, my Appaplacian American bestfriend , or my family (It turns out they aren't just a bunch of liberal fundamentalists. They actually have a lot to share) or any one else.

The only answer to what's different is, I'm a new me.

The last time I went home was Dec 2004. I had no idea where I was going with my life. I had no direction, no goal, no clue. I was a gypsy in all aspects of the word. I was a wonderer of the most confused type. This time I knew what I was doing with my life. I knew where I was going. I had clear goals and direction. I was smiling, laughing, giggling and just having a joyous time. I kind of saw this coming when I went to Provo in March and did the same with DUN & ~Gu~.

Now I'm just trying to figure out what to do with my life. I have a small case of OCD. I used to use it to obsess over KNJ and life in Cali and everything else going on in my life. I used it to make up fantasies that involved ES and I gettin married and showing KNJ up. I have quite the imagination for creating other things to obsess over.

However in the past two weeks, I've noticed I'm not obsessing. I'm ready to fall in love again, but with no viable canidates, I'm not obsessing over that. It's really weird to not have something to obsess over.

Maybe that's another sign that I'm doing better. I don't know, but I'm not going to obsess over it.